19
Oct
Ingrid
I came a cross these encouraging verses today:

Psalm 62: 5-6
Yes, my soul, find rest in God;
    my hope comes from him.
Truly he is my rock and my salvation;
    he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.


I especially love the NIV version because it says : my soul find rest in God...my hope comes from him. This reminds me of what my pastor told me recently that we (humans) are souls with bodies, not bodies with soul.
I find it very interesting when David in Psalm 62 uses the word 'soul'. During this hard time of dealing with miscarriage, I feel like my soul needs more healing than my body. 
Today, after an ultrasound, my OB told me that my womb is returning to its normal size and I will be fully recovered by next week. Then, I began to ponder (and half wishing) if only my soul (read: emotional state) would be fully recovered by next week too...

But Jesus is really GREAT and FAITHFUL!! He led me to check my blackberry only to find verses from Psalm 62:5-6 :) 

(Photo by Kenywid)

Those verses led me to another lovely song called "I will not be shaken" by Jadon Lavik. 
(I often find it very easy to connect to God through singing and reading psalms)

I thought I'd share the video and the lyrics of this song.
I pray that you may also be blessed through this song :)


My soul finds rest in You
My fortress and my rock
My hope for life my hiding place
My refuge and my God
In You I’ve found my home
My shelter from the storm
And I’ll pour out my heart to You
And lean upon Your throne
I will put my trust in You
I will put my hope there, too
I will stand upon Your word
And I will not be shaken
I will let my praises show
Holding on to what I know
Because I know You’re always there
And I will not be shaken
I will not be shaken
(Repeat)
I will not be moved
I’m leaning on the throne
Because You died for me
And called me to Your own
And even when the strongest winds begin to blow
I will stand my ground
I will not be moved
I will not be shaken
---

After all these encouragement... I am not half wishing anymore...
I have faith that God will eventually heal my soul but for now...
I will put my hope and my trust in HIM and...
I will not be shaken (by HIS grace)
17
Oct
Ingrid
Last night was the hardest night of my life...
My husband and I lost our 6 weeks old baby due to miscarriage. The doctor came in @8:20pm and pronounced that our baby has stopped growing and the placenta has shrunk. 
I tried to control my emotion and to listen to doctor's explanations. The doctor tried to cheer me up and told me that I could produce another one next month.
Once the doctor left, I couldn't contain the horror and the pain of losing our baby and I burst in tears.... 
My husband held me in his arms and we both cried. We mourned for the baby...
"Mimi" is what my husband used to refer the baby.
We pray that Mimi would be in a better place with Jesus now. We trust that God knows what's best for Mimi and for us. 

During this hard time, there is a song that God put in my heart. The title of the song is "Bring the Rain" by MercyMe
Here's how it goes:

I can count a million times
People asking me how I
Can praise You with all that I've gone through
The question just amazes me
Can circumstances possibly
Change who I forever am in You

Maybe since my life was changed
Long before these rainy days
It's never really ever crossed my mind
To turn my back on you, oh Lord
My only shelter from the storm
But instead I draw closer through these times
So I pray

Bring me joy, bring me peace
Bring the chance to be free
Bring me anything that brings You glory
And I know there'll be days
When this life brings me pain
But if that's what it takes to praise You
Jesus, bring the rain

I am Yours regardless of
The dark clouds that may loom above
Because You are much greater than my pain
You who made a way for me
By suffering Your destiny
So tell me what's a little rain
So I pray

Holy, holy, holy
Is the Lord God Almighty

---
I know in my mind that God is faithful and He knows what is best for our little Mimi and for us... 
He is the Creator of heaven and earth...
He is the Almighty God...
He is my source of Hope...
For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. -- Jeremiah 29:11

My heart is learning to catch up with my mind...

I pray that the process won't take too long...